Why Opinions Aren’t Truth: Rebuilding Self-Trust and Finding Your Voice

We've all been there—someone shares their unsolicited opinion about your life, choices, or even your identity, and suddenly, self-doubt creeps in. It can be a casual comment from a friend, a family member's well-meaning advice, or even the constant noise of social media. But here's the truth: opinions are the lowest form of knowledge.

This quote, often attributed to philosopher Plato, invites us to reflect on the difference between opinions and true understanding. Opinions are often based on surface-level perceptions, personal biases, or incomplete information. They lack the depth and nuance of lived experience, critical thought, or empathy. When we allow other people’s opinions to define us, we can lose touch with our own wisdom, which is the cornerstone of self-trust.

Why Do We Overvalue the Opinions of Others?

1. Cultural Conditioning: Many of us, especially those navigating bicultural or immigrant identities, have been taught to prioritize external approval over internal truth.

2. Fear of Rejection: We’re wired for connection, and rejecting someone’s opinion can feel like rejecting them—which risks conflict or disconnection.

3. Uncertainty: When anxiety clouds our judgment, we may cling to the opinions of others as a way to avoid the discomfort of uncertainty.

But relying too heavily on others’ opinions often leads to feeling stuck, resentful, or out of alignment with our authentic selves. So how do we break free?

Building Self-Trust: Practical Tips to Value Your Own Voice

1. Pause Before You React

When someone offers an opinion about your life, pause. Take a deep breath and ask yourself: “Is this opinion rooted in knowledge or their personal bias?” or “Do I agree with this, or am I just afraid of their disapproval?” This moment of reflection gives you space to reconnect with your own perspective before reacting.

2. Validate Your Experience

Your lived experience holds more weight than someone else’s opinion. Remind yourself:

“I know myself better than anyone else does” and “I am allowed to trust my feelings and make choices based on my values.” For example, if a friend says you’re "too sensitive" for setting a boundary, remind yourself that your emotional experience is valid and necessary for protecting your well-being.

3. Strengthen Your Inner Voice

Practice checking in with yourself regularly. Journaling can help you explore what truly matters by allowing you to write down your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Additionally, paying attention to your body’s responses to different opinions can offer valuable insight. Notice if you feel tense and anxious or calm and grounded—your body often serves as a more reliable guide than external voices.

4. Set Boundaries Around Input

It’s okay to limit whose opinions you let in. Curate a circle of trust—people who offer thoughtful, compassionate feedback rather than snap judgments. If social media exacerbates self-doubt, consider unfollowing accounts that feed comparison.

5. Celebrate Decisions You’ve Made

Revisit moments where trusting yourself worked out. Maybe you left a toxic relationship, changed careers, or set a tough boundary. These victories remind you that your inner wisdom is a reliable guide.

6. Learn to Tolerate Discomfort

Valuing your own voice sometimes means disappointing others. That’s hard but necessary. Trust that people who truly care for you will respect your authenticity, even if they don’t always agree.

The Freedom of Self-Trust

When you move away from overvaluing the opinions of others and toward trusting yourself, you reclaim your autonomy and peace. Instead of feeling anxious about external approval, you start living in alignment with your values.

Remember: An opinion is just that—someone’s perspective, not a universal truth. True knowledge comes from within: from your lived experience, your values, and the quiet confidence of knowing you’re walking your own path.